Saturday, April 22, 2006

You Might Be an Old-School Christian Fundamentalist If...

1. If you refer to the NIV translation of the Bible as "the Not Inspired Version"...

2. If you refuse to allow people to stamp your hand at amusement parks for fear it might be the Mark of the Beast...

3. If your school cheerleaders wore ankle-skirts hemmed with lead weights...

4. If you believe merely donating money to send Jews back to Israel qualifies as missionary work...

5. If you ever found yourself alone in the house as a child and feared you had missed the Rapture...

6. If you both know who Patch the Pirate is and like him (and I'm actually not ashamed to admit to this one)...

7. If you boycott Disney theme parks and movies but still watch ABC or ESPN...

8. If you consider Christians who don't believe in a 7-year Tribulation to be liberals...

9. If you consider John Walvoord, Hal Lindsey, and C. I. Scofield the top three theologians of the 20th century...

10. If you fear that mixed bathing may lead to dancing...

Then you might be an old-school Christian Fundamentalist.